Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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