Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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