Ah I wish I was there to nurse you then clean up your piss-filled water bottles
for some reason the bedside piss missed the water bottle today
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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