and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
we're making bets on your personal life
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize