Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
