Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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