i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
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