Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
