I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
