dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
