I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
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