Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
