Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I got inside last night via doggy door
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
Randomize