Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
Randomize
