It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
