When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
