I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
Dear Penis Owner...our records show that you are overdue for servicing...please contact our friendly associates to schedule a thoroughly satisfying experience today...operators are standing by...
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
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