just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Randomize
