Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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