Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
Randomize