i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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