I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
dude i'm inner monologue high
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
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