I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
