You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize
