I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
