yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
