Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Moan for me like Helen Keller
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
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