come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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