I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
this just has baby written all over it
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize