Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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