we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
