whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i just google imaged poop.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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