So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
