It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
