What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
