i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize