Umm I'm too high to move.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Randomize
