so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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