Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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