Whatcha textin bout Willis?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Randomize
