yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
