Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
