He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
