how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Randomize
