I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize