I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
