This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Green mimosas i think yes
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
