its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Happiness is laying in bed, topless, pouring 4 packs of hot sauce on your taco bell.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
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