I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
