She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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